Pittsburgh Pirates: Schnoah vs. Jeffr92 - Pittsburgh Pirates

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Schnoah vs. Jeffr92 Rate Topic: -----

Poll: Schnoah vs. Jeffr92 (59 member(s) have cast votes)

Schnoah vs. Jeffr92

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#1 User is offline   Douchius Maximus 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 07:53 PM

Schnoah: This committee is well aware that there is nothing that one can do about their genetic makeup. Genes are genes. You're born with them and they're not going to change. That being said, it doesn't make it any less douchey that Schnoah is a dead ringer for superfag Lance Bass. Speaking of genes, what would make a person continue to tell a group of people that he'll be meeting in the near future, that he's 6'5", when he's actually only 6'2"? We're pretty sure that's the douche gene.

This self proclaimed future major league baseball GM has exemplified his ability to write like a 12 year old girl, by coining legendary phrases like, "STRAIGHT LEGIT," "prolly," and "velo." He's too concerned with himself to bother reading the board before posting a baseball news blurb, which of course makes him one of the more prolific "Molina Artists" on CIA.

In addition, he attempts to prove that he has superior baseball knowledge than other posters by asking, "What's the highest level of baseball you've played?" As if it's not douchey enough for Schnoah to assume that because he played in "High Class A Ohio Summer League," where he consistently hit 92 on the radar gun, that it means he knows more about baseball than anyone else...it becomes that much douchier when the reality is that that he never played in "High Class A Ohio Summer League" and he also never hit 92 on the radar gun.

Can Schnoah set the PSI high enough on his 80lb metal pistol crossbow (with built-in adjustable sight) to put an arrow through Jeffr's chances at advancing in this tournament? Could be.

Jeffr92: What is the proper name for someone that quotes Ludvig Von Mises in his signature? This selection committee believes the name is "Douchebag."

With the exception of sharing some steaming hot Jameson's at MGP Night, this Team Winter member went virtually unnoticed. In fact, when he found all you douchebags gathered together, he just kind of stood there on the periphery until he was practically dragged into the tailgate party. Partygoers were wondering if Jeff might be MGP's lone hearing impaired member as the guy says less than Charlie Chaplain.[Hey Tdippo, Charlie Chaplain was a silent film star, so he didn't talk in his films.] How is it possible that Jeff can be so highly opinionated and at times very aggressive on the board, yet in RL he hardly says word one? Anything is possible in the world of douche.

If it was up to Jeff, we'd go back to the days of dinosaurs and cavemen, when the government didn't get up in everybody's shit. In fact, Jeff thinks there should be no such thing as government. Need a new exit ramp on the freeway? Jeff says it'll just work itself out. He doesn't want organizations...and leaders making decisions...'cause they just take away your liberties and fuck the world up.

As far as his opinions on sports, while he certainly expresses his thoughts eloquently, many see him as overly pessimistic and therefore think he's a douche. He's highly critical of Neal Huntington, to the point where another CIA douchebag nicknamed him "Debbie Downer." He also tries to find the most obscure statistics, ones that not even Bill James has heard of, in order to make a point or further an argument. And if he can't prove his point, he's been known to "take his ball and go home." But he claims that he's never been, "run off by outlaws."

The committee wonders if perhaps he was seeded too low for this tournament. If he wins this matchup could it really be considered an upset? Let the voters decide.


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#2 User is offline   DoctorJohnnyFever 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 07:55 PM

QUOTE
n fact, Jeff thinks there should be no such thing as government. Need a new exit ramp on the freeway? Jeff says it'll just work itself out.


I laughed.
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#3 User is offline   jeffr92 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 07:57 PM

I'm not sure which way this matchup will go. I think I'm prolly the favorite, despite the 13 seed.
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#4 User is offline   mzimmerman81 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 07:59 PM

QUOTE (jeffr92 @ Mar 24 2009, 08:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm not sure which way this matchup will go. I think I'm prolly the favorite, despite the 13 seed.


I voted for you, I mean I had to I bought you a beer at MGP Night, it's a rule.

5 GP

10-16, 4-2B, 2-3B, 9 RBI, 6 R
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#5 User is offline   jeffr92 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:04 PM

QUOTE (mzimmerman81 @ Mar 24 2009, 08:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I voted for you, I mean I had to I bought you a beer at MGP Night, it's a rule.

The next one's on me if there's a CIA night this year, by the way.
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#6 User is offline   Uber Bier Mensch 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:13 PM

Wait a minute, Jeffr was at MGP night?
"I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer." Abraham Lincoln
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#7 User is offline   jeffr92 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:19 PM

QUOTE (Uber Bier Mensch @ Mar 24 2009, 09:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Wait a minute, Jeffr was at MGP night?

I can't tell if this is a serious question or not.
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#8 User is offline   Penguin 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:21 PM

This could be our first upset. Although I don't understand how Jeffr got a 13 seed.
"The business of baseball is to make money, not break even. I don't understand why you think the Pirates should run their team like a charity." - Willlton 6/18/2009

"The Bay trade doesn't look like it (a slam dunk winner), but if you take into account the fact that all they lost was eight months of Jason Bay's services, as well as the fact that even the Red Sox look like they won't be able to re-sign him, it's not nearly the loser many people seem to think." - tWTM 11/26/2009

"Morton is finding himself, now while this may sound weird and out there, but the fact he put on a solo concert at Piratefest shows he finally has the confidence that he lacked within himself that he didn't have in the lower minors." - aso513 2/8/2010

"Dave Littlefield vindicated." - Xiga 4/30/2011 after one scoreless inning of relief by Daniel Moskos.

"Hanrahan and Cedeno would be a gross overpayment for Belt. Sorry, but I'll stick with my realistic analysis of the market and the teams involved." - Steve Zielinski 5/25/2011

"He (Barmes) could have a .000 Batting Average and still be an asset." - bradlej31 5/28/2012

"The last time the Pirates won an extra-inning game in St. Louis that lasted at least 16 frames was April 20, 1986 at Chicago." - Kristy Robinson 8/19/2012

"I want to tweet something clever and interesting to you that will earn your respect and make you smile, since you do that to me all the time." - jpbucco to Colin Dunlap 4/12/2016

"If the Pirates had acquired Giancarlo Stanton from the Marlins, Im not sure they would have won the Benedict trade." - David Todd 11/11/2015
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#9 Guest_Nickflair04_*

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:23 PM

QUOTE (Uber Bier Mensch @ Mar 24 2009, 09:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Wait a minute, Jeffr was at MGP night?



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#10 User is offline   Uber Bier Mensch 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:24 PM

QUOTE (jeffr92 @ Mar 24 2009, 09:19 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I can't tell if this is a serious question or not.

Actually it was. That's truly sad. My memory is shot.
"I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer." Abraham Lincoln
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#11 User is offline   Pjoma 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:24 PM

QUOTE (Penguin @ Mar 24 2009, 09:21 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This could be our first upset. Although I don't understand how Jeffr got a 13 seed.


Seeding was before everyone found out that he was posting as Bullishitter for a couple of years.

"Huntington is doing exactly what he was hired to do, and that the fans and media in Pittsburgh cant quite grasp this, that they still hold the 2008-09 trades against him, is an indictment of their sensibilities." Joe Sheehan 6/6/10
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#12 User is offline   jeffr92 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:28 PM

QUOTE (Pjoma @ Mar 24 2009, 09:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Seeding was before everyone found out that he was posting as Bullishitter for a couple of years.

I was?
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#13 User is offline   Jeff King 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:45 PM

QUOTE (Nickflair04 @ Mar 24 2009, 06:23 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>


No, that's PBD and Mercer.
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#14 Guest_Nickflair04_*

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:47 PM

QUOTE (Jeff King @ Mar 24 2009, 09:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
No, that's PBD and Mercer.


Shit...I think you're right!
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#15 User is offline   Jeff King 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:48 PM

QUOTE (Nickflair04 @ Mar 24 2009, 06:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Shit...I think you're right!


Unless you're saying that the elbow on the left of the screen is Jeffr's, all I see is the elbow, PBD and Mercer.
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#16 User is offline   Uber Bier Mensch 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:53 PM

QUOTE (Nickflair04 @ Mar 24 2009, 09:23 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I see why I forgot you, look what you were drinking.





"I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer." Abraham Lincoln
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#17 User is offline   bucsbriana 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:54 PM

who is the guy in the middle holding the beer, with the penguins shirt?
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#18 User is offline   Penguin 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:56 PM

QUOTE (bucsbriana @ Mar 24 2009, 06:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
who is the guy in the middle holding the beer, with the penguins shirt?

Who?
"The business of baseball is to make money, not break even. I don't understand why you think the Pirates should run their team like a charity." - Willlton 6/18/2009

"The Bay trade doesn't look like it (a slam dunk winner), but if you take into account the fact that all they lost was eight months of Jason Bay's services, as well as the fact that even the Red Sox look like they won't be able to re-sign him, it's not nearly the loser many people seem to think." - tWTM 11/26/2009

"Morton is finding himself, now while this may sound weird and out there, but the fact he put on a solo concert at Piratefest shows he finally has the confidence that he lacked within himself that he didn't have in the lower minors." - aso513 2/8/2010

"Dave Littlefield vindicated." - Xiga 4/30/2011 after one scoreless inning of relief by Daniel Moskos.

"Hanrahan and Cedeno would be a gross overpayment for Belt. Sorry, but I'll stick with my realistic analysis of the market and the teams involved." - Steve Zielinski 5/25/2011

"He (Barmes) could have a .000 Batting Average and still be an asset." - bradlej31 5/28/2012

"The last time the Pirates won an extra-inning game in St. Louis that lasted at least 16 frames was April 20, 1986 at Chicago." - Kristy Robinson 8/19/2012

"I want to tweet something clever and interesting to you that will earn your respect and make you smile, since you do that to me all the time." - jpbucco to Colin Dunlap 4/12/2016

"If the Pirates had acquired Giancarlo Stanton from the Marlins, Im not sure they would have won the Benedict trade." - David Todd 11/11/2015
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#19 User is offline   Jwill55sk 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:57 PM

QUOTE (bucsbriana @ Mar 24 2009, 08:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
who is the guy in the middle holding the beer, with the penguins shirt?


Yes.
"DePaul is about as relevant to this argument as the Steelers are." -Monarch, on a discussion of the quality of the Big East conference
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#20 User is offline   Paco 

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Posted 24 March 2009 - 08:57 PM

QUOTE (bucsbriana @ Mar 24 2009, 08:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
who is the guy in the middle holding the beer, with the penguins shirt?


Who is the Arabian guy?
Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.
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